ask, seek, knock
many believers wonder whether there is a right way to pray. Some experience frustration or even false guilt when their petitions to God go unanswered; some fall into a pattern of reciting a short spiel that is more memorized than memorable.
Yet how often do we follow the guidelines for prayer given by Jesus Himself?
In April, 1998, one of our staff writers conducted a phone interview with Brooklyn Tabernacle pastor Jim Cymbala for a feature story in this magazine. Though the writer had performed hundreds of interviews in his career, this one came with an unexpected fringe benefit.
Realizing that the Brooklyn Tabernacle is well-known for its Tuesday night prayer meetings led by Cymbala, the writer asked the pastor if he would remember a prayer request. The writer’s 13-month-old son had suffered from recurring ear infections for about six months, and upon one more infection the pediatrician would recommend surgery to insert ear tubes.
What came next surprised the writer, who expected Cymbala to simply remember the child in his personal prayer time. Instead, the pastor asked the child’s name and age, and then said, "Let’s pray." The writer dropped to his knees in his office, phone receiver to his ear. And Jim Cymbala prayed:
"Father God . . . we’ve been talking about Your Word and Your promises, and Lord I ask You to touch Baby Jacob. I ask You in the name of Your own Son, Jesus, to reveal Your greatness and Your glory to us once again so that my brother and his wife can tell everyone of Your faithfulness. I ask you, Lord, to curse and take away everything that’s not right in his body, any germ, any infection, any virus. I ask you to make him well, Father God. . . . We’re not worthy of an answer, but we come boldly because we’re asking in the name of Jesus Christ, and You said if we would ask we would receive, and if we would seek we would find and if we knocked it would be opened to us. So we’re asking now, Lord, do this great thing, and we’ll praise You forever and ever, for we ask it in Jesus’ name. Amen."
The writer was left in tears. He thanked Cymbala and hung up the phone. Soon, he would be thanking God. The baby’s ear problems disappeared immediately, and as of this writing more than a year later the child had suffered not one subsequent ear infection. Now that is an antibiotic worth using.
Why was Jim Cymbala’s prayer effective? First, both the pastor and the writer obviously had faith in God to answer the petition. The writer himself had prayed many times for his child, but perhaps God was waiting for him humbly to seek the assistance of others. Also, God waited for the perfect situation in which to most glorify Himself.
A close examination of the prayer reveals powerful keys to effective petitions from a servant of God.
First, Cymbala prayed his prayer and made his request in the name of Jesus Christ, the Son of God. He also asked boldly through and only through the righteousness of Christ, and he remembered God’s promises. Cymbala cited Scripture, quoting back to God the truths of Matthew 7:7-8. Cymbala was specific in his requests concerning the baby’s health. He also acknowledged helplessness. Finally, Cymbala asked for "this great thing," a healing only God could give so He would be praised and glorified.
What a God-centered, God-honoring prayer!
Let’s examine a few of these important aspects more closely in the light of Dr. Stanley’s teaching:
THE WAY TO PRAY
There is not a "wrong" way to pray in the sense that you must worry about saying the wrong thing or using the wrong words. God understands what you are thinking and feeling; He knows exactly what you mean. (Psalm 139:3-4)
Furthermore, the Holy Spirit, who comes to live in you the moment you accept Jesus as your Savior, is continually praying on your behalf:
And in the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words; and He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He intercedes for the saints according to the will of God (Romans 8:26-27).
This past April, one of our chapel services here at In Touch Ministries occurred soon after two students carrying guns and bombs stormed through Denver’s Columbine High School on a murderous rampage.
In leading our prayer time, director of operations Larry Montgomery quoted Romans 8:26-27. He honestly confessed that in a moment of such confusion, anguish, and consternation, no one really knew what to pray for other than God’s peace, healing, and perfect will. Yet Montgomery and thousands of other Christians trusted that the Spirit indeed would intercede with groanings too deep for words.
Understand, God considers essential your attitude in prayer.
God’s ultimate goal is not simply to be a storehouse who grants wishes and desires; instead, His purpose is fellowship, love, and communion. Of course, He wants to bless us with good things, even beyond our wildest imaginations. (1 Corinthians 2:9; Ephesians 3:20) But we are not to approach Him as spoiled or ungrateful children who don’t have love blended with proper respect.
Prayer, whether concentrating on praise or petition, always should be worshipful.
AWAITING GOD’S ANSWER
What does Jesus mean when He says, "Ask, and it shall be given to you"? Will He give me everything I ask for?
This is what Jesus said to His disciples on the hillside as part of the Sermon on the Mount: Ask, and it shall be given to you; seek, and you shall find; knock, and it shall be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it shall be opened. . . . If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more shall your Father who is in heaven give what is good to those who ask Him! (Matthew 7:7-11).
Maybe with all of your heart you asked God for something and you feel that He did not answer you. It was the greatest desire you ever had, you trusted Him with it, but you heard nothing.
Perhaps now disappointment has set in, and praying has become a chore. When you read this passage about the certainty of answered prayer, you wrestle with a little hurt and anger. You wonder, "Why doesn’t God do it for me?"
When Jesus commands you to ask, He is encouraging you to pray and take every concern to Him. But He wants you involved with the answer every step of the way. Notice the progression here. You begin with simple asking, telling God what you want or need and placing the desire in His care.
Then you move to the seeking and knocking phase, looking for His answer and finding the opportunities He brings. At times, all God wants you to do is ask, especially in heartbreak and tragedy. You’re helpless, and He wants you to be quiet and still before Him. (Psalm 37:7; 46:10) But these moments are the exception to the rule.
For example, you ask Him to give you a deeper comprehension of His Word. He does this, certainly, but you have to open your Bible and take the initiative of disciplined study.
Be assured of this: there is no such thing as unanswered prayer; God answers every prayer from His children. He responds with either a yes, a no, or a wait. What most people mean when they refer to unanswered prayer is a request that God has answered no. Sometimes it does not seem like a "real" answer when God doesn’t respond in the way you hope or expect, but what He says is the absolute best for you.
WHEN GOD SAYS NO
What does it mean when God answers "no" to my request?
Look again at verse 11 of Matthew 7. Since you know that God loves you perfectly, you have the confidence that His withholding something from you is a positive, not a negative. God never says no for spite! He always has a reason.
To aid in discerning His purposes, ask yourself the following questions.
How is my relationship with the Lord? Psalm 66:18 says: "If I regard wickedness in my heart, the Lord will not hear." God does not shut off his blessing every time you sin or make a mistake–certainly not–but any unconfessed sin in your life hinders your fellowship with God. If you feel conviction or heaviness about any action or issue, deal with it immediately and put aside any barrier to open and free communication.
Is my prayer specific? When you pray vague or indefinite prayers, you show that the request does not mean very much to you. Otherwise, you would take the time to think it through and verbalize the details. Anything less is like going into a restaurant and ordering "food and drink." You need to state the desires of your heart with precision, so that you will know when God has answered and so that He receives the glory.
Is the request in keeping with the character of Christ? In other words, is it a prayer that Jesus might have prayed? Think through your motivations and ask the Lord to reveal your true intentions. Selfishness, pride, wrongful ambition–check to see that no other purposes are polluting your petitions. Read James 4:3 and consider that the why of your prayers is as important as the what.
Do I really believe God will answer me? Doubt and prayer don’t mix at all. If you approach the Lord worried that He does not hear or will ignore you, you become like the faithless one described in James 1:5-8, double minded and unstable in all your ways. When you worry and waver, you essentially undermine the peace God plans for you to have. Read Hebrews 11:6 and pray in joyful expectation of His reply.